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Real Men Recover

5/26/2013

1 Comment

 
"In 2001, I found a poem about AA written by my grandmother. My Family was full of alcoholics, so I vowed to always watch my drink.  My father died in a fire.  He was drunk, and the cigarette he was smoking caused the deadly fire.  Alcohol is not my problem, and I hate smoking.  But I am a compulsive overeater.

Being a man kept me away from OA for many years.  I thought a man shouldn't worry about bingeing, and what real man throws up to try to control his weight?  When I hit rock bottom weighing 341 pounds, it didn't matter. I was desperate and needed help, and I discovered I'm rarely the only man in the room.

I went to my first OA meeting in 1996.  Thinking about Steps Four and Nine kept me in-and-out and uncommitted for years.  In fact, I never heard the work "Sponsor" until this last time around.  Having someone guide me through the Steps has kept me honest, open and willing to believe in the Twelve-Step process.

When it was time for me to be a sponsor, I made up a rule that I would only sponsor men.  I was afraid of the intimacy involved in the process and didn't think it was a good idea for me to sponsor women.  I no longer keep that rule, and my sponsor is a strong, recovered woman.  I sponsor anyone, but it's smart to use common sense when sponsoring.  Remember, real men recover!"                                                      -James

                                                                                                                          -Lifeline, November 2009
                                                  
Men - Do you ever feel like the "Odd Man Out" at a meeting? Did you have a difficult time finding a sponsor? How has your perception of the sexes of OA changed since you joined OA?

                                                                                                                          
1 Comment
Tony A
7/2/2013 02:50:51 am

Regardless of gender, I've found many more similarities than differences when it comes to the effects of this disease and the way forward to recover. Each of us has our stories, but one thing is clear - if I don't reach out to you, I am getting less than a full chance to be happy, joyous, and free. I ask for the continued willingness to put differences aside and hear what I need to hear from every person in the meeting room!

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